Hacks!
Make you faster.
Tips!
Make you smarter.
Tricks!
Make you cleverer.
Tools!
Make you faster than hacks and tips and tricks alone.
Shortcuts!
Make you think you've beaten the system, but you cut corners so you secretly hate yourself for...
Cheating!
On your spouse and your taxes.
So you...
Murder!
Which makes you like most boys and men on the planet who lived before the 18th century who had to serve in savage and bloody wars. Starting at age 15 and engaging in hand-to-hand combat often in deep mud, because one person, a dictator or king or Caesar, wanted more land and power. But not you, you believe in...
Equality!
You're not afraid to fight for what you believe will make a better world, you're...
Fearless!
Which makes you superior to people who admit they have doubts, fears and vulnerabilities, but not you, because compared to them you're...
Thinner!
Your body mass is less than, or more compact, or better proportioned.
And you're blonder!
Which used to just mean that you lived farther from the equator, but now we have a cheat for that...
Loreal!
Which, in addition to your hacks and tips and tools and tricks make you better, smarter, faster, richer, and able to feel superior so you can dominate all perceived competition... which is the opposite of the equality you claim you stand for.
You hack.
Make you faster.
Tips!
Make you smarter.
Tricks!
Make you cleverer.
Tools!
Make you faster than hacks and tips and tricks alone.
Shortcuts!
Make you think you've beaten the system, but you cut corners so you secretly hate yourself for...
Cheating!
On your spouse and your taxes.
So you...
Murder!
Which makes you like most boys and men on the planet who lived before the 18th century who had to serve in savage and bloody wars. Starting at age 15 and engaging in hand-to-hand combat often in deep mud, because one person, a dictator or king or Caesar, wanted more land and power. But not you, you believe in...
Equality!
You're not afraid to fight for what you believe will make a better world, you're...
Fearless!
Which makes you superior to people who admit they have doubts, fears and vulnerabilities, but not you, because compared to them you're...
Thinner!
Your body mass is less than, or more compact, or better proportioned.
And you're blonder!
Which used to just mean that you lived farther from the equator, but now we have a cheat for that...
Loreal!
Which, in addition to your hacks and tips and tools and tricks make you better, smarter, faster, richer, and able to feel superior so you can dominate all perceived competition... which is the opposite of the equality you claim you stand for.
You hack.
